what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
