He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
