grandma shit on top of the toilet
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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