i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
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