Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
