And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize