I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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