that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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