Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(315): View more from New York

she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.

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(559): View more from California

my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding

Fav 13 5904 997
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(519): View more from Ontario

i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.

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(303): View more from Colorado

I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies

(1-303): View more from Colorado

You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?

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(615): View more from Tennessee

I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?

Fav 4 1487 713
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(201): View more from New Jersey

I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.

(1-201): View more from New Jersey

Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!

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(416): View more from Toronto

my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge

Fav 3 34 65
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(850): View more from Florida

Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.

Fav 0 11 27
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