it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
