With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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