But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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