Moan for me like Helen Keller
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
