But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Randomize
