I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
