sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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