gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
