Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
