that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
