Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
