Me too!
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
