4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Randomize
