If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
She tied me up with her honor cords...
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
