Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
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