Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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