This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
