Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
