I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
