This girl is more easily done than said...
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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