I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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