i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
My vagina is very pro this idea
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize