THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
