Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
