i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
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