Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
