Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
