If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
