remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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