the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
