Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize