Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
