awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Randomize