Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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