Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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