someone threw a dead crab at me
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize