Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Randomize
