what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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