we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
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