Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
