Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
