Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
